Women’s Self-Love Get’s No Love
BY: CHASYN CARTER
The Dailymail UK recently published an article on the nature of backhanded compliments to women. A prominent twitter blogger and author Feminista Jones recently created a twitter thread on acceptable responses deemed by men to their catcalling or “compliments”. Jones observed the negative reactions by men when she agrees with the compliments they give when catcalling at her.
“P*ss a man off today: Tell him you agree with his compliment of you” she tweets.
Jones continues with the twitter thread with her personal observation of men’s responses when she agrees with compliments given. She even goes on to say some men have had negative reactions when she’s said ‘Thank You’ to the compliments in a manner they didn’t deem thankful enough.
“I’ve had SEVERAL men tell me they’ve found ‘Thanks’ an offensive reply to a compliment given to a woman (several laughing emojis)” Jones adds to her twitter thread.
As the thread gained popularity, more women commented, sharing negative experiences with men retracting their compliments to the women. Some men have even gone as far as insulting the woman they just complimented for not giving the response they desired.
“Why are people so bothered by someone having self-confidence and self-love?”, was the rhetorical question asked by Feminista Jones in an interview with Buzzfeed.
She also acknowledges not all men do this but encourages those who speak out about being “not all men” to listen to women sharing these experiences.
“When men go, ‘Not all men,’ they make it about ‘I’ve never seen it, I’ve never done it…so it can’t be true’” she states.
The surge in popularity brings about an important discussion about the nature of catcalling and backhanded compliments. It seems from the instances of many women, that compliments can only be applicable if the woman disagrees or only says “Thank You” in a manner deemed respectable enough by the man giving the compliment. When a woman responds in agreeance or says Thank You or just “Thanks” that lacks gratitude, many men retract the compliment and sometimes insult the same woman.
The widespread outcry of women with similar experiences in these situations shows this is an ongoing problem. While it may not be all men, it’s enough men to have a substantial impact on women in different places. The twitter thread by Feminista Jones started a conversation on twitter between men and women larger than just backhanded compliments; Jones created a space for multiple women to share experiences and start dissecting the deeper issues in catcalling in all aspects, not just the compliments.
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Read the Buzzfeed article here:
Find the twitter thread by Feminista Jones Here: