“I Attempted Suicide But Accidentally Shot My Mother Instead.”
BY SUSAN JOHNES
As a child, Tammy Johnson was sexually tortured and molested by three people in her family. Nobody knew the incident except them.
That was just a minor problem because bullying in school was also awaiting her. “I was being bullied in school because I was dark skinned and a little smart and different from other students.” Tammy also wore glasses and nicknamed the “ugly duckling,’ ending up being rejected at school as well.
Even though she had a rough time dealing with all that, she didn’t tell her mom. “I didn’t know anything about being the victim of sexual assault or bullying. Additionally, I didn’t know what was right or wrong because my abusers told me if I said something I would get taken away from my mom.”
Tammy stated that her mom had taught her about reincarnation. “I thought suicide would give me a chance to start over. At 12, there was nothing like the internet. Deciding to make a suicide was like a new beginning for me. I decided to leave my mom a note and let her know what was going on.”
Tammy got access to a gun. She attempted suicide which failed and accidentally shot and killed her mom instead. She says no one would understand that she was sexually molested hence her reason to attempt the suicide.
Tammy stated that there was something she heard the judge say. “Okay, let’s send her away to a juvenile correctional facility in Delaware, Ohio.” Tammy was there from the time she was 12 until 21 years.
Tammy said it took her a long time to forgive herself for what she had done. When she left the institution, she had no idea how to live. “I had a greater emotional intelligence, but I didn’t know how to pay a bill.”
Tammy says that she thinks about her mom all the time and see her everywhere when dealing with her 18-year-old-girl. To remove the guilt, Tammy had to take her daughter through her life in bits so that it wouldn’t overwhelm her.
Tammy is always sharing her story with others to let them know that they need to be free to their kids. She emphasized on the roles that the parents and teachers need to engage to learn that they need to bring technology into the classroom because there is much happening with our kids.
Her last message to the women is that they shouldn’t care about what happened to them in the past, but have a right to move forward. “You have a right to live your life and to redefine your journey.
Read the original story here.