black women

Author says black women asked for the “baby mama” ad by embracing single motherhood

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This article was sent to us by Nojma Muhammad.  Muhammad seems to believe that the recent ad by Baby K’Tan showing a single black mother was a manifestation of black feminists who were seeking to “do it all by themselves.”  She says that after all of the years of so many black women embracing single motherhood, the chickens are coming home to roost.  Read her article below and tell us what you think.  

by Nojma Muhammad

I see that a lot of Black Women are in an uproar about the Baby K’Tan packaging. Really? Wasn’t the “Say It Loud I’m A Single Mother and I’m Proud Posse”, begging to be recognized on Father’s Day because ,let you all incorrectly tell it…you’re BOTH?

On my NojmaReflects page on Facebook and on other sites Single Black Mothers were trying to convince us all that they needed a banner right? Well, here it is, celebrating Single Black Motherhood. But yet you have an issue with this? Black Women and our fallacious reasoning! We promote Father’s Day Cards for Mothers, we want credit for something we are NOT and can NEVER be(a man), but when something is manufactured that represents the reality that all the Single Mother’s were talking about on Father’s Day, we cry foul.

On Father’s Day you were dropping the statistics about Single Mothers (“because Black Men have abandoned their homes/families”) so according to YOU…doesn’t this reflect the condition of the Single Black Mother? Now I am reading comments from women that are miraculously stating that these statistics don’t matter and aren’t always correct. But these statistics were your entire premise on Father’s Day. Now they don’t matter? Oh I get it, they don’t matter in THIS situation. When a “majority” of Black Women were demanding that they be told Happy Father’s day, the majority were represented.
Now, all of a sudden, this doesn’t represent the “majority” of Single Mothers. Hmmm. Interesting.

This is what I don’t understand. How can Hallmark and Mahogany be so ON POINT, when it comes to recognizing the Struggle of the Single Black Mother, but this company has completely missed the mark? Hallmark/Mahogany were so astute to the condition of the Black Family, that they recognized that a card needed to be made to salute the Single Black Mothers out there. Black Women LOVED that. But somehow, this marketing company is off base, when it is promoting exactly what Single Black Mother’s campaigned for. Black Woman you’re being heard! This marketing company heard you, and thus a brand was created to reflect all that we have been saying over the years.

As Black Women we want the ability to condemn, then escape our own culpability. Black Women, things like this are a DIRECT result of us promoting the Absent Black Father Myth. We love to put those absent Black Father’s on blast right? The real issue and ultimately the hypocrisy is that we love the Father’s Day Cards for Mothers, because in our minds, it projected a reality that made us “feel good”. We wanted something to say “Hey Black Woman, it is apparent that you are holding down these Black Families” and this is your reward. So those Father’s Day Cards for Mothers, gave us validation. But now, when we see this Black Woman holding her baby, on a shelf next to a Family, we don’t like the reflection. We don’t like that mirror. We don’t like the side by side comparison. That image doesn’t make us look or feel good. We only like images, billboard, blogs and movement that show the Single Mother in a favorable light. We don’t want to have honest discussions about how we BECAME Single Mothers. We talk about the trail of children left by Black Men, but become mute when I mention the path started with the womb of a willing woman.

Black Woman, we have to be mindful of what we promote and propagate. We have become advocates for “The Absent Black Father Myth”, and now we have received backing. That’s what happens when you advocate for a cause. You are looking for someone to champion your cause, to fight with you and to be a spokesperson in the struggle.

Black Woman…say hello to the newest sponsor of your cause. We’ve been saying we don’t need men to raise our children for the longest time. Well, this product is that mantra realized, specialized and on a shelf near you.