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Should Modern Women Marry Traditional Men? Steve Harvey Explains

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A couple appeared on the daytime TV show Steve Harvey to discuss whether or not a modern woman can marry a traditional man. www.naturuallymoi.com

Couple seeks advice on “Steve Harvey”

Reported by Barry Burch Jr.

A young couple, Brittney and Loren, appeared on daytime TV show “Steve Harvey” to seek out some advice with regard to women taking on their husband’s last name after marriage.  The two people who provided them with sound advice were none other than Dr. Phil, who was a guest on the show, and Steve Harvey.

Brittney explained that though she and Loren have a great relationship, when they discuss marriage they have disagreements.  She described Loren as “traditional” and herself as a “modern woman,” saying that Loren wanted to be the bread-winner and wanted her to stay home to cook and clean.  Brittney does not see marriage this way.

One of the largest issues for Brittney is the name change following marriage.  Although she has agreed to hyphenate her name, Loren wants her to say goodbye to it completely.

When Dr. Phil asked Loren if he had anything to say, Loren said he respected the idea of an independent woman, but in his household, he wants a woman that cooks, cleans, and takes care of the children.  Dr. Phil asked, “So you would give her permission to be independent?”  Loren, who obviously had not thought about his situation in this way, admitted that the answer was yes.

Dr. Phil explained to the couple that their main problem was selfishness.   While listening to them tell their story, Dr. Phil said that he kept hearing the word “my” over and over again.  “‘I want her to take care of my house, I want her to take care of my kids, I want her to cook my dinner.’  My, my, my, oh my,” said Dr. Phil.

Harvey told Loren that he is in for some trouble.  While he agrees with Loren on his disagreement with the name decision, stating if a woman wants to keep her maiden name she should “marry her daddy,” Harvey says there is no way in this day and age that Loren can expect a woman to be cooking and cleaning up after him.

Dr. Phil explained to the couple that every day they wake up, the first thing they should be asking themselves is “What can I do today to make this marriage better?”  He said that there are people in the world who would be happy to have a man that wants what Loren wants; however, Brittney is not one of them.  Therefore, if they want the relationship to work they will have to be open to negotiation.  He added that the couple will also need “emotional integrity” meaning that they will need to refrain from telling each other what they want to hear.

“Don’t make a deal and change it,” said Dr. Phil.  “If ya’ll can’t solve this trust me, walking down the aisle, filling some paperwork out at the courthouse is not going to fix this.”

Barry is an award-winning writer and political scientist.  His business, “Barry Writes,” provides biographies, speeches, press releases and so forth to individuals and businesses in need of potent and compelling literature.  Reach him @ Facebook.com/barrywrites and Twitter.com/barryburchjr